I Promise, No Kool-Aid:

While I was at the wedding this summer, I was standing in line, talking with Gorrden when I noticed the beautiful indian woman and her husband in line in front of us. As is my habit, I looked down to check out her shoes and saw that she had on these fantastic beaded moccasins. The woman was increadibly shy, but when I complimented on her beautiful moccasins and asked her if I could take a picture of them she lit up and told me absolutely. I asked her if she had made them and she said no, that she hadn't been able to bead since she had had her stroke, and that her sister brought them back for her from Canada. She was very proud of the fact that they were moose hide. Recently I have been wanting to explore my culture, to wrap myself up in it and relax down into it. I've been wanting to have something that I can call my own, something that I feel that I belong to. When I see moccasins like that, with the intricate beadwork, it makes me long for that cultural envelopment even more, but I get overwhelmed with the idea of where to start. As a Texan transplant with roots in Browning, Montana I think it might be hard for me to find a way to connect down here. I realize that I could immerse myself in the culture of wherever I am at the time. That I could use my nomadic roots and rather than one culture, I could assimilate many and make them my own, but when you create something new or your own version of something you're still alone. You don't have a sense of community. So what do you do when you're not willing to join or start your own cult?